Hey Men – Don’t You Dare Blame Sandra Bullock for Jesse James Cheating!

Men who justify cheating belong in the same category as people who sue McDonald’s for being fat.

Male biology prompt men to seek quantity over quality, and men with easy access to willing bimbos may face more temptation than most, but I have one thing to say to a men who claim being away from their wives cause them to cheat:

GET ON A PLANE AND GO SEE YOUR WIFE YOU LAZY SO AND SO!

Are you really so out of control that you can’t endure a three hour plane ride, and have to help yourself to the bimbette hovering around your office.

There’s nothing wrong with being a guy who wants sex from lots of women, just be honest about it and don’t get married.

But if you want to marry a quality woman like Sandra, Erin or Elizabeth, and have her commit to being faithful to you, part of the deal is that you are faithful to her.

Our biological instinct may urge us towards all kinds of bad behavior, but becoming an evolved grownup is about leaning to manage your emotions and your urges.

I went to high school with Sandy Bullock, she’s a truly nice person, and I hardly think that being a hard-working award-winning actress whose goes out of town to DO HER JOB is appropriate cause for her husband to cheat.
Read the Article at HuffingtonPost

Moms, Are You Put Down or Put on a Pedestal?

I’ve always said: Motherhood is powerful monarchy and indentured servitude at the same time.
Read the Article at HuffingtonPost

Sitcoms: Fun For Kids or Ruining Young Minds?

I was blasted for my recent commentary “Confessions of a TiVoholic” because I admitted I let my kids (ages 11 and 16) watch sitcoms. 

One reader went so far as to tell me that by letting my kids watch I was contributing to the foul mouthed culture of fifth graders who use the F word.

What do you think, are sitcoms  trash or just benign humor?

Which ones do you like, and which are contributing to the downfall of our moral values?

Why Facebook and husbands don’t mix

I recently wrote about Why I’m Unfriending My Husband On Facebook I guess the world felt sorry for him, because he’s now been besieged by lonely women from across the country who want to be his “friend.”  

“If your wife won’t put you on her page, I’ll put you on mine Big Boy,” wrote one enthusiastic reader from Buffalo. 

You’re welcome to put him on your friend page sweetie, but I’ll let you in on a little secret, I didn’t really take him off mine.   You see I’m kind of like,  a humor writer, and part of my job description is to make fun of my family,  and part of making fun of them is exaggerating our antics.  

Yes I know, it’s not quite as glamorous for them, as if I were say a movie star, or rock star, and my job was to dress in tight leather and adopt impoverished children.  But hey, mom has a paying gig, and part of the job is sacrificing her family on the alter of America’s funny bone. 

I try to never embarrass my kids, but my husband?  He’s a big boy, in fact he’s an even bigger boy than when I married him, so I figure he’s grown a tough skin.   

What do you think, should comedians and humor writers make fun of their family or not?

And should I tell my husband that all of my ex-boyfriends are now sending me Facebook notes.  Yep both of ‘em.  

And guess what?  They’re Twittering me too.

You gotta love the Internet and airbrushed pictures, I was never this popular in high school!

Save Me: My Daughter Wants To Enter A Pageant

Where did I go wrong?  I bought her the tinker-toys and the trucks.  I read her the book about how girls could be President too.  I took her to work with me.  I introduced her to my girlfriends, the lawyer, the doctor, the teacher, the minister.  She even had a woman pediatrician.  

And now she comes home telling me she wants to enter the Little Miss Dogwood Pageant.  

What would Gloria Steinem say?  What would my mother, the chemist with a Masters Degree say?  

It’s official, I am a terrible mother, I might as well have smoked crack when I was pregnant.  

My 11-year-old wants to enter a pageant.  Oh sure, they say there’s a personality component, wink, wink, a call for world peace and a cheesy grin will probably be all you need fot that one.  The important elements are  the runway walk, the cutest eyes competition, the most photogenic award. and I bet my baby will clean their clocks when in comes to poise and talent. 

I am about to become a pageant mother.  I wonder where you can get a good deal on a size 11 evening gown and a used baton?

Does Sarah Palin give coaching?

Do all women begrudge their man a nap? Or just married mothers?

After being dissed by bloggers all over the net for recent my column:

Why Do Women Begrudge Men a Nap?

I realized I should start my own blog, so that people who want to criticize my writing will have a central location to air their grievances.

It’s all about serving John and Jane Q. Public.

And as it turns out the public is filled with women who nap while their men take care of the home.

So I want to know – Are these couples married?  Do they have children?  And if so, who raised these men and why are they not out doing seminars on every college campus in America?